Monday, March 12, 2007

A bit of a Revelation

Ok, indulge me here for a moment. As I near my 50th birthday,(less than two months away)and while I'm in the midst of this "rite of passage" (perimenopause)I seem to be seeking the meaning of "me". Ok, ok, what I mean is, what am I here for? And as bad as it may seem to say this, (believe me I feel guilty) I've decided it is time for me to be .....selfish. There, I said it. It is no secret that women often live their whole lives trying to DO, trying to BE, trying to MAKE happiness for everyone else. And the revelation that I've come to or almost have come to, is that you simply cannot make everyone happy. I've said this, I've been told this, it is not a new statement to me, but I've never really bought into it. I've always tried to think that I could make everyone happy. And you know what, you can to a degree but guess who ends up feeling cheated? Guess who ends up NOT happy?
And so, that being said the gift I'm giving myself for my big birthday is to do what I want to do that makes me feel good. Selfish isn't it??
And now, one other little thing that I guess I've come to realize is this. When someone does something that would in the past upset me, guess what? I choose not to let it bother me, and not because I'm a nice person who turns the other cheek, I choose to not become upset for ME!
I don't want to be upset! (This is wisdom that apparently doesn't come to you until you near 50 years of age.)
And so I say "Bring it on!" I'm ready for whatever the rite of passage has to offer me. And I'm ready for the big 5-0 too. I'm going to be one Wise, Selfish, and Happy woman!

3 comments:

Anonymous said...

Isn't it interesting how we sort of have revelations sometimes and then you think, "Now why didn't that occur to me before this?" I see you freely share your age. I don't mind sharing my age, but there is one thing I will not freely share and that is my weight. I go on these blogs and they are counting down their weight and have photos of themselves. I am sure it is very liberating, but that is one thing I just can't do! I wish you well for your 50th..are you planning something interesting for the big moment?

heiresschild said...

hi robbin,

i come via ellie's blog. i don't think you're selfish at all. you're right, as mothers, wives, and maybe women in general, i think we fall into that pattern of always doing for, and trying to please others. i'm 54 yrs old (will be 55 this year), and in 2005, for the first time, i began to live for me, and i'm luvin' it. my children are grown and married, so it's my time now. i have my own life, and i'm free to do whatever i want.

have a blessed 50th year celebration because that's exactly what it is: a CELEBRATION. celebrate yourself and enjoy whatever you do, that day and in life period.

Kelly said...

Robbin,

There is nothing selfish about making your happiness 1st & foremost in your life!