I have to close tonight so I go in at noon and get off at nine.
I'm reading a book I got for Christmas, thirteen moons. It's a good book to get into. You can check it out here. It is written by the guy that wrote Cold Mountain. Barely into it but I like it so far. Not a book that goes fast which is what I wanted.
J is in bad shape. He came to my mothers yesterday before I got there and she pissed him off and he took off. He was looking for a fight I think but it upset her and she is too old to get so upset, especially on Christmas but he is all messed up and I'm not sure he is taking his meds which causes him to have rages if he isn't taken it. Bipolar is an awful disease and when the people who love him have a hard time understanding it, it is hard for everyone. It is hard for everyone anyway.
I just don't want my child, who is now almost a thirty year old man to end up on the street and I will fight to the end for that not to happen. But one thing I've come to realize is that probably a big number of homeless people that are mentally ill are not there because they don't have a family that cares. Sometimes you can do all you can do and still they end up in jail or the streets. I don't want that for J but time is marching on and if things don't get better I will be wiped out emotionally as well as financially and we'll be right where we started. I don't know the answer and my heart breaks for him.
Ok, enough of that! I hope the weather gets better, it is an ugly day and not all that cold but chilly and damp! Ok, coffee is ready and oatmeal too...off for breakfast.