Thursday, June 19, 2008

Just Me Rambling

I had a chat with Kammy on the computer last night and I told her I was sending her a surprise in the mail today and she is very excited. She told me she loved surprises and wanted hint. I told her "nope" no hints. I hope she'll like the bracelets. I didn't get a necklace made, we'll see how she likes the bracelets first.
Also her mother is coming to this town next Saturday to attend a party for a friend and says that Kammy can stay with me if I want that afternoon. I have to work but she can come after work. The only thing, and I didn't mention this to her mother but that day happens to be Jonathan's birthday. I'm not sure how I'll be that day but then I thought maybe that would be a good thing. My parents are taking a short vacation that weekend and I'd be home all alone that weekend anyway.

I was off yesterday and spent most of the morning with my mother. Like me, she has good days and bad days. She and I, being so very different can offer each other very little comfort. She tends to want to put Jonathan on a pedestal, as we often do when we lose someone and I choose to remember him just as he was, it was who he was, the whole package, the good with the bad. I can be at peace with my thoughts and spend just a little time with her when she is having a bad day and leave her with mixed up feelings. Because it was suicide, we differ in our thoughts about that too, of which I won't get into that here, but anyway, as usual, it is hard for me to understand some of the thoughts she has, and I guess hard for her to understand what I think.

Anyway, off to work I go today again, and we'll see how it goes. I still feel so good physically and for that I am thankful. Work seems to energize me. If I'm home I don't seem to have any motivation to do anything around here. Hoping you all have a good day. (It is cool here for a Georgia June morning (in the 60's) but no worry, we'll get up into the nineties before the day is over.)

4 comments:

Marge said...

Good morning to my amazingly strong new friend! I'm so glad your days are going well, and that work seems to help you keep going. I think that's often the case, the familiarity of work brings the rest of our lives back into perspective. And I think that Kammy coming to visit this weekend would be a wonderful blessing and comfort to you. What a special time to begin working on your relationship with this special child. God bless you.

Marge

Tammy Brierly said...

I've been catching up on your posts ( I thought I put you on blog alerts?). You are one amazing lady! Your post on "Perspective" was moving and wise.

I visit WA regularly to visit three of my grandson's. I hope you like rain but it is so beautiful.

Keep busy girl and if you need to talk or email just let me know. I'm glad your feeling good!

HUGS

Robbin said...

Hey Marge, first of all I was so happy to read the good news of your friend's daughter. And second, yes, I've decided that day will be a good day to spend with my granddaughter. Not this Saturday but the next. His birthday is the 28th. I hope you had a peaceful day today.

Robbin said...

OH Tammy, I just got home and the first email I had was you and your lists of our things in common. It made me smile. Thank you so much, and see...what I meant about your poem and my post? Please come back often.